Tuesday, February 28, 2006

So Much To Blog, So Little Time...

Jeez, it's Tuesday, I'm still not done with the recent weekend, and the next one will be soon upon me!!! Where does the TIME go, people? New moon, new beginnings. This moon promises to bring better things, I can feel it. And soon to be a new month! In like a LION, out like a LAMB.

I learned this past weekend that I can blame just about everything on vicodin right now. Even spelling errors. Baster, get a friggin' dictionary next time you want to attack someone gramatically. Douche.

Movies I rented, AND a brief review, if you guys can stand the inevitable incorrect grammar:

The Exorcism of Emily Rose ~ Slow, but disturbing. Anything based on a true story spells disturbing, and this one was, on many levels. And I thought *I* had some strange experiences!

The Ring 2 ~ Well, you kinda knew what to expect, if you saw the first one. The second one, well, I'm gonna have to see it again, blame the vicodin. From what I DID see, it was pretty freaky.

Hitch ~ I am a HUGE fan of Will Smith (yes, I would SO do the Fresh Prince). Not to mention I'm also big fan of Kevin James, so I thought those two were hilarious together. If there weren't so many GUY sorta references during this movie, it could very well be considered a chick flick.

Must Love Dogs ~ Okay. John Cusack. Diane Lane. Two actors I've always adored, their characters finding each other romantically, in the cutest way ever. The critics said something like, "finally, a love story for adults." Yep. TOTAL chick flick. But I loved every minute of it. And what's cool about it is, it didn't make me GO all "chick flick." I used NOT a kleenex one. Had I not watched it alone, ey, maybe different story.

Hey. I actually got to REST these cracked ribs this past weekend, and for that I feel blessed. Next weekend is for cleaning. I can't fucking WAIT.

Treble Bounce

Much love & peace for your mind. You know who you are.

Friday, February 24, 2006

Ribs Part II ~ Pictorial

Okay - so I GOT the ribs and shit like that...

Then I rubbed one out...(McCormick GrillMates "Barbecue" rub RULES!) oh...yes...yes....yes.........YES!!!!!
It slow-cooks at 200 degrees for 3 hours and then it...puts the sauce on its' skin and then it barbecues again....

Meanwhile, I made hot potato salad and steamed asparagus

Time to take things off the grill and plate things up...

WOOT!

Treble Clappy

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Vicodin Fixes EVERYTING, Mon...

First off, I really gotta say THANKS to all who stopped by (some over and over again) to BFM me. Birdy, thanks a LOT. This should be done at LEAST once a month. I've NEVER had that many comments, and it was absolutely RITEOUS. Now I can get that fingernail transplant I've been needing. And don't think you're immune...when you LEAST expect it....mwa-ah-ah!!!!

SECOND, but not least important, and getting into my Vicodin story: About a week ago, I was running into the kitchen at full speed and smacked my right side FULL ON into the corner of the breakfast bar, which comes up JUST under my uh, "breast area."

"AAAHHHH!" I cried. "That's gonna leave a mark."

I didn't think much of it at the time (alcohol involved? me?), but ever since, the pain's been waking me up at night and every time I sneeze, cough, laugh, or strain my voice, I feel like I'm being kicked by a horse with a hot shoe. (Yes, even to SING hurts like hell, which hurts even worse.)

So I was uh, "talked into" going to Urgent Care today, and, when x-rayed, it was discovered I have two cracked ribs. Not one, but TWO. Hey, when I do something, I do it RIGHT. There's nothing they can really DO for broken ribs, as there's no "cast" per-say. Just lots of time, taking it easy (yeah, right, and tell the Pope not to pray), and PAIN MEDICATION. Let me tell ya something about Vicodin: it really DOES fix everything. Not only has the pain subsided, but NOTHING and I mean NOTHING bothers me. My brother came over with one shoe off, one shoe on (isn't there a nursery rhyme about that?) and tap-danced. He's a nut. I even watched like 10 minutes of "The Golden Girls" and thought

Bea Arthur was frickin' hilarious! Okay. Let it be known right NOW that I will NOT be abusing this shit. Especially if I start thinking that show could become a "must see." Damn I must be hallucinating.

I almost feel like I shoulda broke my ribs a long time ago...hee hee! At least maybe now I'll be able to sleep through the night.
Treble Xray Chill Pill

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Don't Go Into the Basement

So! The basement door was ALWAYS kept closed. It squeaked, and no matter what we did, we couldn't stop it. I will warn all of you right now that the word CREEPY will appear several times during this post.

So, you walk down, and immediately to the left was an "outhouse" looking box that was supposed to serve as a 1/2 bath, but we could never use it because it was always either backing up or the toilet just plain didn't work. Ugh.

The floor of the basement was painted BLOOD RED, and the walls were institution green. CREEPY. This is where the washer and dryer were kept, and, of course, one of my chores was to help with laundry. I NEVER went down there alone, always coaxed one of my brothers to come down with me. If you continued on past the washer/dryer, there was the furnace room, which doubled for my dad's "workroom." You'd THINK it would be warm with the furnace in there, but it, too, was always cold as hell. There was one wall where a name was painted in RED and then covered with green paint, and no matter HOW many times we tried to paint it over, the name still kept coming through: Stutzman. HMM. Too much like LUTZ for MY liking.

Then there was the "fruit cellar." You open this weird slatted door and had to step UP to get into it. The floor was DIRT. WHY? Anyway, there were shelves of really old, dusty fruits and vegetables, probably put up by people who lived there in the 1900's. We never touched them. Behind ONE set of shelves, though, was a "wall" made of just wooden slats. One day, my brothers and I got curious and started tearing the slats off. EASILY done, as they were rotting. What we found behind was a totally open space. We got our youngest brother to go a little ways in, and after about 5 minutes he came running ~ no, SPRINTING out of there screaming his head off, looking pale and VERY terrified. To this day he said he can't remember what he saw but we're guessing that this "space" was part of a tunnel for the underground railroad. Makes sense, being located where it was and in which part of Ohio. CREEPY! Perhaps our "ghosts" came from there. We'll never know, and I'm not sure I really want to. I'd LOVE to check the history of the house though.

No one EVER wanted to go down to this basement alone. Call it a "vibe," but even my mom and dad hated spending any time down there alone. We tried our best to make it LOOK as homey as possible, but that weird vibe just wouldn't go away, so we never really hung out.

I'll get to the attic and the barn another time. I've got a chill just thinking about that creepy basement. YUCK.
Treble Mummy

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Ghost Hunters...

The other night, I watched a program called "Ghost Hunters." Give ME a break. I laughed myself right off the couch. I'd love to see these guys spend 7 years in the house I did in northeastern Ohio growing up.

This house was OLD. I think they called it a "century home." It was a beautiful big brick house with a big ol' barn, where yes, I had a horse. From a distance, it looked like the perfect home. Big ol' buckeye tree in the front yard, cherry tree in front of my brothers' window, HUGE maple tree outside my window, three apple trees in the backyard, blackberry briars down the hill along the property line. AND a HUGE hill on the property next door which was AWESOME for sledriding in the winter. I mean PERFECT.

Until....the "visitors." Nonny, you prolly know where St. Rt. 82 is, running through Mantua Corners, right? Anyway, our house was on that stretch.

One night, at different points, the WHOLE family saw the same ghost. It took the shape of a man in a suit and hat, carrying a suitcase. My parents were getting ready for bed; my dad was in the bathroom, and "it" stood in the doorway of their room. She thought it was my dad and called out to him, but he called back from the bathroom, and she just sat there, kind of freaking out. It disappeared through the wall at the end of the hallway. On the other side of that wall was their closet, which was ALWAYS freezing cold, no matter WHAT time of year. (There were a lot of really weird "cold spots" in that place.) Anyway, my brothers' room was just across the hall, and THEY saw it not long after that. Sometime during the same night, it woke ME up, took my hand and lead me down the hallway only to disappear into the same wall. WEIRD. Nobody really talked about it until days later, but all of us just kind of freaked out as we heard everyone else describe the same "being." My mom thinks it was her stepdad, the only grandpa on her side I really knew. Strange.

My bedroom furniture used to get rearranged on an almost daily basis while we were at school. I talked to my brother about this the other night, just to confirm it wasn't some event I conjured to make my life seem more interesting. haha! Talk about a scene out of "Poltergeist!"

Then there's a matter of the basement, but that's gonna have to be for a different day. I WILL say this much about it: it wasn't your ordinary basement...

Treble Ghost

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Nascar on the AZ Loop 202

Before I say ANYTHING ~ Olympic ice dancing gets me HOT. I mean effin HAWT!

Okay... ... ... HOLY MOLY!

My dad's birthday was Friday. YAY! Still kickin & young, the HUGEST Pink Floyd fan on the PLANET, still funny as hell, still one of my best friends EVER; him AND my mom. I had one of the BEST times over there on Sunday. I felt more connected to them than I have in a long time. Okay, enough mush.

Little Bro was there, too, and we left the 'rents house at about the same time. Sitting at the light getting ready to turn onto the "short stretch" of freeway that leads us home (we live in the same apartment complex), he decides to punch it around me the second the green arrow hits. He FLIES down the onramp, flipping me off out his window (a certain trademark of our rivalry), and, of course, I take off after him.

We could have been compared to the Labonte brothers, except we weren't doing 180 mph. And we weren't fighting, or driving on some sort of oval track. And I'm....well, uh...a girl.

ANYWAY! We were by NO means driving erratically, just a playful "race home." All of a sudden, bro taps his brakes as if to say, "dude, something goin' on here." The he REALLY had to tap 'em, as did I, and traffic went all weird. Seems to me, some chick in a minivan coming down an onramp didn't look and all of a sudden it was like a scene during the Daytona race today. Cars spinning out, people honking, jeez! You'd think we were driving in a blizzard or sandstorm or something.

Really, I don't think we had anything to do with it.

We blew by it (no one really wrecked). Before we knew it, we were home, getting out of our cars, and high-fiving because our great driving abilities got us BOTH out of what could have been something messed up. DAMMIT!!!!! I could have BEAT the fucker....haha!

Man, my KINGDOM for a couple laps against my brother at Firebird Raceway... how cool would THAT be?

AAHHHHH!!

Please, sir, NO MORE....

Friday, February 17, 2006

Ah JEEZ

I HAD a really cool post for today, thought I saved it as a draft to post this morning, but NOOOOOO....

It'll have to wait till Monday I guess. Damn.

I'm so glad it's Friday. Maybe over the weekend I can figure which way is up.

Momma told me there'd be days like these...

Face Plant

Thursday, February 16, 2006

My Date With Uncle Sam

So, America's buddy, Sam, asked me out. Being the good, law-abiding citizen that I am, I HAD to accept. It's like taking out the boss's out-of-town nephew or some shit like that.

I gotta tell ya ~ what a cheap-ass bastard. Not only would he NOT pay for anything, he made ME drive. (Oh, NO, taking HIS limo would be a waste of America's "resources.") And when the night was said and done, he wanted to come in and, well, DO things to me without so much as a kiss. Uncle Sam doesn't believe in foreplay. Asshole bent me over before I even had a chance to make coffee and well, let's just say there was NO lubricant involved. OUCH. I may not shop for weeks. MY "resources" have been officially tapped. Bet that whole, "I'll call ya!" never pans out, either. Ass.

Being in accounting, I do my own taxes. Being single, and living in an apartment, I get off (no pun intended) pretty easily by doing the short form. (Who YOU callin' EZ????) It's funny how, last year, when facing plenty of penalties for cashing in a 401 K the year before and taking some time off, I got the big "OH!," and now for this year, after working my ASS off and letting him take me for money I'll probably never get back, (can you say Social Security?) I am getting close to nothing. I'll get MAYBE a third of what I got back last year. Go figure. Don't you get at LEAST 9 to 25 for RAPE in this country? Hmmm..... he could have at LEAST worn the stilts from the parade last year, THAT might have turned me on or something. What a bastard.

Yeah, I don't think I'll be going anwhere with ol' Sammy soon...somehow I just want to throw my tea in his face...

On another note: hey, at least I'm not being terrorized in a third-world nation, where OUR troops are fighting for THEIR rights.

Bitter? Me? Naaaaahhhhh.......

Treble Accountant Uncle Smiley

Monday, February 13, 2006

The "Thingy..."

So Saturday I got my hair cut. CHOPPED, actually. I LOVE it! Shorter than I would have normally gone, but it looks great, if I don't say so myself. It's gonna be MUCH easier for me, and that's what I need right now.

Anyway, my hairdresser is also one of my best friends and my brother's ex, so after "the chopping," we went to get some lunch. She mentioned I STILL hadn't seen her new condo, so we headed on over there, and had a blast.

ANYWAY! In the midst of our conversation, she jumps up and says, "OH MY GOSH! I almost forgot, I was going through some stuff and found THIS:"

She hands it to me and says, "I'm not sure what it is, but I think it's your brother's. It looks like either something you blow on, like a harmonica or kazoo or something or..."(as she pulls it apart)
"...something you might use to like, TUNE something with or something..." (I've mentioned before that my brother's a musician.)

I laughed my ever-lovin' ASS off.

"_____," I said, "it's a fucking duck call..." and proceded to show her.

Talk about a good laugh. I asked if she was actually blond. Then I drove her parakeet insane with the damn thing.

Treble Rubber Duck Duck 2

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Out of the Mouths of...well, Amichai's Alma Madda..haha!

Amichai (Only Zool on my sidebar links 'cause I'm too lazy ~ hey, it's friggin' Saturday and I just altered my life as I know it) posted this little gem....

I swear I rolled on the floor crying myself silly from that video. OH, to be this creative is a gift. A GIFT, I scream to you!

Hollywood is out of control. Amichai, KUDOS for sharing this wonderful piece of cinema with the world. I say ~ more parodies, more laughter, and more, well, as the Beatles said,

"All ya need is love... "
Treble Love Song

Friday, February 10, 2006

Disk Jockey Antics

So Fitz, the afternoon guy on my local radio station, decides to call directory assistance Thursday afternoon. Why? I don't know, I missed it. All I heard was this:

"Directory assistance, for what city?"

"Phoenix."

For what listing?"

"Chew....BACCA"

I laughed so hard I about wet myself. They ACTUALLY looked it up. By the time the phone call ended I was in tears with stitches in my sides.

SO THEN, I'm chattin' it up with Nonny, and SHE tells me about
THIS SITE!!!! There are some really creative people out there...

Neeless to say, I got ZERO work done after that. Laughter is good. VERY good.
Treble Roll

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

A Thousand Words

OH, Here I Go Again...*

I LOVE my local radio station. The guys are hilarious! The commercials suck ass, but at least it's free. I refuse to pay for Sirius or any other satellite radio, because believe me, folks, the commercials are COMING. I pay for cable now, because it's the only thing available, and the commercials are horrendous. The only thing I'm really "paying for" is more channels. It NEVER used to be this way. You got LESS commercials, MORE shows, LESS censorship (don't EVEN get me started about THAT FUCKING SHIT), and MTV was, well, MUSIC television. They should change their name to RTC. "Reality TV Central." When did this happen? Reality TV has taken over the country. While I do admit to having been addicted to Survivor (sorry, Non) and Joe Millionnaire at one point, that shit got real old, real fast. I'd rather watch a rerun of Charmed or CSI before I watch this dribble. OVER AND OVER again, it's the same premise: "How can we get people to just fuck with each other? How can we tear loving families apart, and best friends into enemies?" Man, I was even appalled at the whole Osborne fiasco. How STAGED is all this shit? There just seems to be NO creativity in the world anymore. Even movies are being re-done ad nauseam. Ugh, I'm truly disgusted with it all. Gimme a new mindless sitcom or something that's gonna at least TRY to entertain me and my "not-at-work" mind. And PLEASE, our kids hear George Carlin's Seven Dirty Words on the playground, classroom, mall and all over the "real world" streets!!! Why do they bother to censor the word "asshole" on tv, when there are clearly parental controls available? I don't get it. OH, wait, NOW I DO. Babies having babies, who've not had a chance yet to ... ah dang, what good would bitching about THAT do?

Anyway, it just seems every NETWORK channel that's on has some reality show on. I know, I know, you're saying ~ "hey, read a book, listen to music, surf the net!" I read all day at work. I get my fiction in, too, on breaks & lunch (I'm currently reading Stephen King's 7th of the "Gunslinger" series...IS it the final one? I'll letcha know when I finish).

I will NEVER tire of music or the impact it can have on your soul, and have seriously been thinking of learning how to use the equipment H has here to record some things. If not, I've got other options available to me, but I'm determined. I'm just so tired by the time I get home the last thing I think about is playing with the computer, although all day long, all I wanna do is surf the net. Not to mention, my "me time" in the den is WAY limited. Go figure. Hopefully that will be resolved soon.

And oh yeah, one more thing: CRABBY, You GO, Miss (or Mrs., whatever the case may be)!!! DON'T LET THE TURKEYS GET YOU DOWN. I am behind you one hundred percent, and then some, if that's possible. Stand your ground. Just because it feels like your lab blew up doesn't mean you can't pick up the pieces and get back to creating. CHOP CHOP !!!!!

OOPS!!!! Okay, one more "thing," then I'll jump off my soapbox: GREENDAY. Good LORD ~ will these guys just STOP already? I'd like to find the person who signed these whiney dorkass punks and get his/her momma to slap him/her. THEN I wanna slap his/her MOMMA for even encouraging such trash. If I hear the "When September Ends" song ONE MORE FUCKING TIME, I am gonna scream. In fact, I've said that before, and DID scream. (I KNOW a lot of it is the "program director's doing - bastards!) Newbie at the front desk (front desk, front desk, newbie at the front desk, ugh!) thought that to be funny and then gave me an hour-long dissertation about the band, and then how much he hates Nirvana, and then about others he's seen in concert...
I now, seemingly, work in hell proper.
Treble
freak of the day! Luge

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

I Got Nuthin'

Actually I do, but no time this morning. I really gotta think about writing my posts at night and putting them up in the morning. Uh...

Okay then...
Wink

Monday, February 06, 2006

I Love the Word "Juxtaposed"

I know the pieces fit
cuz I watched them fall away
Mildewed and smoldering,
fundamental differing
Pure intention juxtaposed
will set two lovers souls in motion
Disintegrating as it goes
testing our communication
The light that fueled our fire then
has burned a hole between us so
We cannot see to reach an end
crippling our communication
I know the pieces fit
cuz I watched them tumble down
No fault, none to blame
it doesn't mean I don't desire to
Point the finger, blame the other,
watch the temple topple over
To bring the pieces back together,
rediscover communication
The poetry that comes from
the squaring off
between
And the circling is worth it
Finding beauty in the dissonance
There was a time that the pieces fit,
but I watched them fall away
Mildewed and smoldering,
strangled by our coveting
I've done the math
enough to know
the dangers of our second guessing
Doomed to crumble
unless we grow,
and strengthen our communication

Cold silence has
a tendency to
atrophy any
Sense of compassion
Between supposed lovers

I know the pieces fit...
I know the pieces fit...
I know the pieces fit...
"schism" ~ Tool
And life goes on....
Jigsaw Puzzle

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Master of puppets I'm pulling your strings
Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams
Blinded by me, you can't see a thing
Just call my name, 'cause Ill hear you scream
Master
Master
Just call my name, 'cause
Ill
Hear you scream
Master
Master
Master, master, where's the dreams that I've been after?
Master, master, you promised only lies
Laughter, laughter, all I hear or see is laughter
Laughter, laughter, laughing at my cries
Fix me!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Testing

I'm just testing to see if blogger is down or what. Looks like certain parts of it are down. They've GOT all our emails, why don't they just shoot us a "mass email" to tell us they'll be down? Would that be just too easy?

One ponders...

Friday, February 03, 2006

Wha-Wha-WHAT???

Fuck. Just plain FUCK. And I don't mean copulation.

Entertainment, IMMEDIATELY!!!!
Groundhog's Day Turtle Nosy Neighbor Monkey Dumped Cancer Broken Heart

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Happy Lobster ~I Mean~ Groundhog Day!

Well, it's official, at least from this little corner of the world. Larry came out this morning, saw the boiling water for tea and high tailed it back to his tank in a HUGE hurry. Looks like 6 more weeks without seafood. Damn.

HAPPY Groundhog Day!!! (can ya HEAR the polka music?)


This could also be another movie I could watch over and over again. Is it my imagination, or is Bill Murray aging ever-so-nicely? I just think this picture makes him look REALLY sexy. He's come a long way from his SNL days, that's for sure.

When I lived back east, we LIVED for Groundhog Day in the winter, what with all the dang snow and wretched weather. Actually, we had our own groundhogs in the backyard, so we'd do our own version of Punxsutawny Phil. We'd wait for those suckers to come out of their holes and....

Okay, the rest is just too graphic to share. My uncle did most of the dirty work, and I never looked. Those little bastards would spook my horse almost every time I rode. I'm lucky I didn't end up like Christopher Reeves...

I personally am rooting for 6 MORE weeks of winter, meaning that the desert heat will be put off for that long. I think. I don't know how we determine that shit down here. I think it's more like, walk outside: is it hot? No. COOL!!! Another 6 HOURS of winter...
Treble Groundhog's Day
This may just be the freakiest smiley yet. Can't. Stop. Laughing.